Ask for Help

You never need to feel shy or scared about asking questions. Reaching out for help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

You do not need to be shy

Every girl has questions about her body. Every girl feels confused sometimes. The difference between girls who worry silently and girls who feel confident is often just one conversation with someone they trust. You are allowed to ask. You are allowed to not know. You are allowed to need support.

Remember

Asking for help is brave. The women and girls before you had the same questions. The women after you will too. By speaking up, you help break the silence for everyone.

Who can you talk to?

Your mother or older sister

They have been through it. They might seem busy or even awkward at first, but most mothers and sisters want to help. Try saying, “Amma/Didi, I have some questions about my body. Can we talk?”

A trusted teacher or school nurse

Schools often have a nurse or a teacher you can talk to privately. They are trained to answer health questions and can connect you with more help if needed.

A doctor or health worker

If something does not feel right with your body, a doctor can examine you and give proper advice. There is nothing embarrassing about seeing a doctor for a health concern.

Wings of Hope volunteers

The volunteers who visit your school or community are there specifically to support you. They bring reusable pads and education, and they are happy to answer questions in a safe, respectful way.

When to see a doctor

Most of the time, what you are experiencing is normal. But there are some signs that mean you should see a doctor or health worker:

You are 15 or older and have not started your period yet.
Your periods are extremely painful, even after rest and pain medicine.
Your period lasts longer than 7 days or is extremely heavy (soaking through a pad every 1–2 hours).
You have itching, burning, or unusual-smelling discharge from your vagina.
You feel a lump or painful swelling in your breast that does not go away.
You feel very sad or anxious most of the time for more than two weeks.

If you are unsure, it is always better to ask. A quick check-up can give you peace of mind.

Questions you might be too shy to ask

“Is it normal to have discharge every day?”

Yes. Clear or white discharge is normal and healthy. It is your body’s way of keeping itself clean. Only worry if it smells bad, itches, or changes color.

“Why do my breasts hurt sometimes?”

Breast tenderness is common, especially before your period. It happens because of hormone changes and usually goes away on its own.

“Can I get pregnant if I have not started my period?”

It is very unlikely but technically possible if your body has started ovulating. If you are worried about this, talk to a trusted adult or doctor immediately.

“Is it okay to touch or look at my private parts?”

Yes. It is your body, and it is normal to be curious. What matters is doing it privately and with clean hands.

“Why is one breast bigger than the other?”

This is very common during puberty. Breasts often grow at different speeds and usually even out over time. A small difference in size stays with most women and is completely normal.

“I have hair growing in new places — is that okay?”

Yes. Hair under the arms, on the legs, and around the private parts is a normal part of puberty. You do not have to remove it unless you want to. It is your body, your choice.

“My period was regular but skipped this month. Am I sick?”

In the first 1–2 years, cycles are often irregular. Stress, travel, exams, weight changes or illness can also delay a period. If you miss more than 2 cycles in a row, talk to a doctor or ASHA worker.

“Is white staining on my underwear dirty?”

No. It is called vaginal discharge and it means your body is healthy and self-cleaning. Change your underwear daily and wear cotton — that is enough.

“Why do I smell different now?”

New sweat glands become active during puberty, so body odour changes. Bathing daily, wearing clean cotton clothes, and washing under the arms with soap keeps you fresh. This is not dirty — it is growing up.

“I feel very sad or angry for no reason. What is wrong with me?”

Nothing is wrong with you. Hormones during puberty can cause big mood swings. Rest, talking to a trusted person, and gentle breathing help. If sadness stays for more than 2 weeks, please speak to an adult or a helpline.

“An older boy or man makes me uncomfortable. What do I do?”

Trust your feelings. Move away, tell a trusted adult (mother, teacher, ASHA worker) immediately, and do not stay alone with that person. It is never your fault, and you have every right to say no.

“Can I do sports or swim during my period?”

Yes. Gentle movement often helps cramps. Use a well-fitted pad and change it often. Rest when you feel tired — listen to your body.

What to do in real situations

Sometimes the hardest part is not knowing what to say or do in the moment. Here are common situations and simple, kind ways to handle them.

Your period starts suddenly at school and you have no pad.

Fold a clean handkerchief or cloth inside your underwear as a temporary layer. Quietly go to a female teacher, the school nurse, or an older girl and ask, “Do you have an extra pad?” — most will help without any fuss. Wings of Hope and many schools keep pads in the staff room.

You get a stain on your uniform or skirt.

Tie a sweater, dupatta, or jacket around your waist. Ask a friend or teacher for help — this happens to almost every girl. Rinse the stain in cold (not hot) water as soon as you can; cold water lifts blood better.

A classmate teases you about periods, breasts, or body changes.

You do not have to argue or explain. Walk away and tell a teacher you trust. Teasing about the body is a form of bullying, and adults are supposed to stop it. You have done nothing wrong.

You feel too shy to tell your mother your period has started.

You can write a short note and leave it for her, or say, “Amma, I need to talk to you alone for two minutes.” You can also start with an older sister, aunt, or a teacher first — whoever feels safest.

Your family says you cannot enter the kitchen or temple during your period.

Every family is different, and you do not have to fight anyone. Quietly know this: science shows periods do not make you impure, and food you touch does not spoil. You can still study, play, and take care of yourself. When you are older, you can gently share what you have learned.

You have very bad cramps and cannot focus in class.

Sit down, place a warm water bottle on your lower belly if possible, sip warm water, and try 4-4-6 breathing. Ask the teacher for permission to rest in the sick room. If cramps are severe every month, please see a doctor — you do not have to suffer silently.

Someone touches you in a way that feels wrong.

Say “NO” loudly if you can, move to a safe place, and tell a trusted adult right away — mother, teacher, ASHA worker, or call Childline 1098. It is never your fault. Keep telling adults until someone listens.

Your friend tells you she has started her period and is scared.

Listen without laughing. Say, “That is completely normal, it happens to all of us.” Offer a pad if you have one, help her find a bathroom, and go with her to a teacher if she needs one. Being a kind friend matters more than knowing every answer.

You feel very sad, lonely, or hopeless for many days.

You are not alone and this is not weakness. Talk to your mother, a teacher, a school counsellor, or call iCall (022-25521111) or Childline (1098). Big feelings can get better with support — please reach out.

You want to know something but feel too embarrassed to ask a person.

It is okay to start by reading — this website, school health books, or asking a Wings of Hope volunteer in writing. You can also ask a doctor or ASHA worker privately; they hear these questions every day.

Helplines and resources

Government Helpline for Women

181 — Women’s Helpline (toll-free, available in many languages)

Childline

1098 — 24-hour helpline for children and young people who need help or just want to talk.

iCall (TISS)

022-25521111 — Free counseling over phone, email, and chat for young people.